the flawed mental health care system

After arriving in the Sunshine Coast 20 weeks into my pregnancy, it was time to get organised… arrange scans, doctors appointments, midwife care, and decide what hospital to have our baby at. It was all a bit overwhelming, but I was now living close to my sister who helped me get on top of everything and held space for me to ask plenty of questions at all times of the day and night.  
 
I experienced some bleeding at 22 weeks, so we went to the hospital to get it checked out. Fortunately, it was just a little scare and our babe was happy and healthy. While at the hospital, I took the opportunity to book in for the birth of our baby. The process includes doing a patient health questionnaire, which asks a range of questions including a psychological component to determine your risk of developing post-natal depression, and if you require any extra support.  
 
At the time, I thought it was a general screening and wasn’t expecting questions relating to my mental health history, childhood experiences etc. I could feel my chest tightening, my breath getting shorter, tears welling in my eyes, until I couldn’t hold it in anymore.. I just burst into tears, and had a minor anxiety attack. The midwife was incredible. She was so kind, patient, and genuinely cared. She softly explained why she needed to ask these questions, and told me I could take a break and continue when I’m ready.  
 
After a moment, I held myself together and went into detail about my long history with depression, suicidal thoughts and attempt. I spoke about difficulties in my childhood, my constant anxiety about my past being brought back up to the surface now that I am about to become a parent, and my family history of post-natal depression. I shared all this deeply personal information, which was very difficult to talk about. But I understood the importance of receiving mental health support. I felt a great responsibility to ensure my health is in the best condition it can be, before bringing a child into this world.  
 
The midwife who initially dealt with me, as I said before, was incredible. She advised me of the process, she said based on this information I was in high-risk category and someone will be in contact with me to discuss mental health support. I walked away from the hospital feeling emotionally drained, but relieved.  
 
In the next few weeks that followed, I had three midwife appointments, one over the phone, two in person. I had mentioned each time that I was waiting for a psychologist referral. I was asked questions about my mental health history, childhood experiences... all over again. And again, I cried. She assured me that she will put in a psychologist referral, and someone will be in contact with me.  
 
10 weeks past, I still hadn’t heard anything. I followed up four times, and sent an email with my concerns; How the screening process triggered a trauma response, and failing to follow up with the appropriate mental health care was reckless and irresponsible. I explained how I’ve been proactive in trying to receive support and I was deeply concerned for other women, perhaps in a more vulnerable position, who may have slipped through the cracks also.  

No response.  
 
2 weeks post email, I sent another one. This time I kept it simple and slightly passive aggressive. I forward my original email and wrote; ‘ironically my email about how I have slipped through the cracks, has slipped through the cracks.’

I received a phone call immediately from the patient liaison team. She told me the nursing unit manager will call me later that day, if she doesn’t to please let her know.  
 
2 days later, I hadn’t heard anything. I emailed again, advising she never called.  

Finally after 12 weeks, four verbal requests, and three emails asking for someone to please follow up with a mental health care plan… I received a phone call from the nursing unit manager. She very unapologetically stated that she has looked at my file, and I don’t meet the requirements to receive any mental health care. 

I raised a few issues;  
Firstly, if that was the case, why was I told twice I was in a high-risk category and someone will be in touch? 
 Secondly, why did it take 12 weeks of me hassling them to find out I wasn’t eligible for mental health support? 
 And finally, if someone who has a long history with depression, who had experienced difficulties in their childhood which they were concerned would be brought to the surface becoming a parent themselves, and a family history with post-natal depression DOESN’T meet the criteria for mental health support. Then who does??? 
 
She simply replied, if you would like a reevaluation I can organize someone to call you. I just said, “forget it, I’m not going through that process a third time. I just pray other vulnerable women have a better experience than I have.” 
 
After the phone call, I tried explaining to Jordie what had happened. I couldn’t stop crying. I have tears even as I write this. I’m a passionate mental health advocate. I have spent years sharing my experiences, trying to raise awareness of the importance of speaking up. To not be afraid to reach out when you’re struggling and need support. And if you ever feel like the world is crumbling, there is help available. You are never alone. 

Yet, after that phone call, I felt desperately alone.  

I felt betrayed by the system I passionately advocate for.  

For help and support, check out this brilliant website
PANDA is dedicated to supporting the mental health and wellbeing of expecting, new and growing families. Through a range of information, services and programs we support parents and families during pregnancy the first 12 months of a new baby.
https://panda.org.au